Mental Anguish

Lately, I am undergoing a lot of mental anguish where I am constantly thinking about the things that are happening in my professional life. It has reached a point where I am now mentally stressed out and just feel like leaving everything for a while and heading out somewhere far. I have also been thinking about how my life has taken shape over the last decade. The opportunities I had and how I let it slip out of my hand. Just thinking about all those things is making me feel really sad and stressed out. There are so many things which I want to do, but I am not able to do because I am so dogged down with the current obligations. Almost half of my pay goes in paying the EMI's and I am yet to buy a house. Every morning I wake up just thinking about all these things and saying to myself that things will get better. I know, only I can make them better, however, I dont know why I am not even trying. Whenever Geeta tells me to do something abt it, I say I do not have the time. I always keep putting things away even though those are things that I should be doing. May be I am too used to living this way. May be this stress is an integral part of me. May be I am too afraid to take a chance to change things for the better. I dont know.

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